The Last Bow

As my life grows by,
my heart reverberates vaguely,
eyes wander inquiringly—

I expected to hear loud explosions
of your heartbeat… your artificial smile,
witness the blue cigarette  smoke curling,
masquerading your face…

You devoured me… with your artificial smile,
the blue smoke, your breath, engulfed me…
the hatred and love in your blue eyes
in the chilly winter day……. ahhhhhhhh!

The cold still travels with me
it envelopes like a shell,
Yes, its a dreary life… and yet….


I think i’ve hardly lived….
despised my family, left my responsibilities…
but in these final moments,
when life is at the verge of engulfing me…

I am again up for sale—
I wish someone had a proposition.


Duh!

Remembrance

I ponder why everything seems so dusky somedays,
the wind that blows rekindles the fire, fire in my eyes,
in my heart.. in my soul..
I reminisce over the memories, a small rendezvous, and act; you and I,
your lies, your eyes..and the scent of your skin, chest, and lips..

the smell of your skin lingers my soul..

I remember an unfinished drink.. an unfinished cigarette..
unfulfilled promise.... duh!


and then there are your lies, i knew i couldn’t trust you, i compromised,
I cried.. but still i believed in your lies.


I remember... you and I rapt in oblivion
an embrace of racking struggle
vanishing into unknown
your face gleamed over
woods congregated, heights serrated
liquid harmonies dripping from lips
their piercing sweetness
the juice of divine vintage... i knew you are not for me. but still i believed
in your gleaming face, you dripping lips, your lies.


for me there is nothing left, no lust matters now, as in my reverie,
I see you,, far away.. just a silhouette..
and then I see you... the grotesque wraith of love,
the silliness and malice , surrounding you..
sex and disgust,,,cobweb and gossamer...and then
I see the bare body, bare chest, brown eyes.....

everything seemed so mixed up... Everything about you
was a compromise, so variable!


one thing that was constant and dependable in you...
not your brown eyes.....

but your selfishness and your pretentiousness..

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PS: again i m bored..... just tell me if i mixed it up again..
i feel like crap now!